I know everyone has their own way of setting goals. If you don’t have or you don’t know what you want to do in your life, you may be confused about what to do and be lazy every day. I was like a very lazy man. I didn’t know what I really wanted to be. But finally I found a way to set it up. So I would like to share my own way of setting goals.
This article is written for:
- Those who do not know how to set goals.
- Those who set goals but fail to achieve them.
- Those who have a hard time keep going.
If you are having a hard time sticking with things, this article is for you.
First of all, you need to think about what a goal is for you. And, you need to think that it goes pretty deep. Setting serious goals has the power to change your life.
They are not easy to set, and if you don’t know yourself well, you will change your mind as soon as you set this goal, and it won’t last. However, the truth is that you can only know your true self by continuing to work toward that goal.
You may change your goal again and again, and it could succeed sometimes, that is what it is, but I will focus on talking about “continuing ” in this article. Because you can quit right away is easy, but you can keep doing it is quite difficult for everyone.
Since then people were able to do this as a child, but as they became an adult, forgot about how to become the real them. Because we will care about acting adults, no more kids. Like, we don’t cry in front of people, you want to ride a roller coaster but you don’t because you are a mature man, something like that.
So first, be clear and real, no lie to yourself about what you want to become.
Have you ever realized what you wanted to be like or what you wanted to do?
As adults, we have easy access to a wide variety of information, which makes it easy for us to look around and see what others have to offer, or to wonder if we are making the wrong choice, and now more and more confused.
So, let’s think back to when we were a child .
From the time you are in middle school or high school, you start to be inhibited by the scale of the world, because you are able to make a lot of decisions. The college you want to go to or the high school you want to go to, even though you tried your best to do your best, but unfortunately you could not go to the high school of your choice because you did fail, right?
Then you experience your first setback and decide to enroll in another high school with slightly lower academic standards.
Perhaps in these kinds of ages, you will have already weakened to think of yourself then, and you don’t know exactly what you want to do to the best of what you may have thought. If you think that way then, Yes, you don’t care much what you really want to be. So, you may focus on thinking of an earlier age than a high school or a junior high school. and you remember what you really want to do at that age.
For example, when I was six grade, I was like “I want to play video games! so I will finish what I don’t want to do (classes, housework, etc.) as soon as possible. and play all day long hahaha!.” You have to remember what you used to do and what you used to keep doing.
In my case, it was video games. I want to get back home from school as soon as possible and beat the slime (a monster of a video game). I also used to draw things like four-panel comic strips like Dragon Ball. When I was doing what I wanted to do, I had a clear goal. I was working for two hours straight, sometimes for an entire day without eating.
Yes, this was really my goal at the time. Some people might think that if it was such an easy goal, I could enjoy doing it, but even if it became a difficult goal, such as passing the most difficult University, such as Harvard, we need to do it with the same mindset.
The question we have why can’t we enjoy goals like that anymore?
Did I finish the game that easily when I was a kid? I doubt it. I spent quite a bit of time and a whole day on it because it was fun and I could make the player stronger and go to the last dungeon and beat the last boss. Looking back now, it seems easy, but that is only because we already know the outcome and now we interpret it as easy because it is something we could have done in the past.
The problem is that we are not engrossed in the task rather than the difficulty of the task.
That kind of serious engrossment diminishes as we grow. Or rather, it becomes harder to understand. There are so many unnecessary temptations that we get distracted by other things. And then you stop. You lose your own faith in the possibilities for that place and think that it could be anywhere else.
This is because you are stuck with an outcome you have not yet seen. You don’t know what the future holds, but you have already decided what you are capable of. This is no way to have fun. It cannot be fun because it is too difficult to get results, and it cannot be fun because it feels impossible to think about it with your level as now.
So, anything that does not produce results quickly or things are unsuccessful is considered a waste of time. This can be said for everything, whether it is continuing to think about the person you love, not giving up on your dream job, or continuing a task what you like, exercise, etc. For example, a common trivia about love is, “Don’t chase after one partner.” And, “Play with more than one to scatter your emotions and get the other person’s interest.” It makes a lot of sense. People go away when they are chased.
I can relate to that very well, because I also pull away when a woman chases me. But if I like the person, I will not escape from her though. However, even though the methodology is not wrong, I wonder if it is really good for me to scatter that great feeling and passion that I have for one person. What if I could have a feeling that the level of love would shrink.
Even if I try to love one woman and that person hates me as a result, I have already learned great love from that experience and I can create that love within myself. But if I keep dispersing my feelings to other women, I may never know true love.
Isn’t it a better experience to learn one love even if you can’t have sex, kiss, hug, or express affection, than to spread your feelings around and not get what is important? So I am thankful that I have someone I love and who gives me the energy to live, just because he or she is there and I am allowed to bring my passion to him or her. To be honest, we are also very happy just to have one partner, but when we try to use that feeling for someone else, our energy and passion are dispersed and confused. So we are forever unable to realize our true love. In other words, we can’t find a partner with whom we can truly feel passion and joy.
You cannot observe the movement of your real emotions. In this modern society, it has become the norm. And it is so commonplace. Most people don’t even realize it. I used love as an example but the same can be said for your dream and job. There are things that you really want to do, but you can’t keep doing them.You ever cannot finish it.
The reason why is because, as I mentioned earlier, you think about the outcome first and cannot enjoy a process, look for another one because you have a lot of choices and get more confused, tired. When you are doing so, also passion is gone.
And you look over things because that don’t produce results, such as the person you like not being attracted to you, a new job that doesn’t bring in any money, or a diet that doesn’t seem to be helping you lose weight.
And quit.
From this point of view, therefore, we don’t think of the actual action we are taking toward our goals as a great thing in itself. Does it have to be understood by someone or something else? Or is it a bad thing if it doesn’t produce results?
When I was a kid.
I had my best shot when I was kicking a soccer ball with friends.
I had the most fun when I was drawing cartoons.
I was at my best when I was beating slime when I was playing “Dragon Quest V.”
And I remember that, The ending of Dragon Quest( one of my favorite video games). After a soccer game. When I finished drawing a comic book. At that moment, I felt a sense of accomplishment, but after that was just like the end. It’s like heaven and earth compared to the fun moments while playing and doing.
What I’m trying to say is; The best part of life is not the result, but the moment you are playing.
You have to be able to feel this first. You have to feel that you are having fun while you are doing something. That means to understand how you are feeling at the moment. Clarify what kind of feelings you are currently experiencing when you are doing the thing. Are you having fun, are you bored, what do you really want to do, etc.?
The more attention you pay to this, the more useful information you will have to help you set goals. This is real information that comes from inside you, not from the Internet, not from social standards.
If what you are currently doing as a goal does not make you feel the same passion and obsession as when you were a child, then that goal may be a mistake.
It is very simple.
As long as you are being misled by the outside world, you will never see your real goal.
It is inside of you, and if you don’t know it, there is no way to set a goal. If you set a different goal based on different information when your deeper mind is seeking that goal, life will not be enjoyable, and you will probably end up quitting or giving up as a result.
This is true for all the people you love, all the jobs you love, and all the things you love. How you feel about your girlfriend/boyfriend, your job, or your dream is the most important thing when setting a goal.
When you need to give up or quit is when you are not serious.
If you give up when you are serious, it is like giving up your life.
In summary:
- If you set goals and don’t continue, you don’t know what you really want to do or who you are yet.
- You don’t need to decide what you are limited.
- Don’t imagine a bad future, create a good future.
- Don’t focus on the outcome, enjoy what is in play.
- Concentrate on your inner feelings and emotions, not on information from the outside world. (Feel)
- Enjoying what you are playing for is your real goal.
Once again, ask your heart and see.
Who you really want to be.
Be real.
Imagine yourself as your goal, and enjoy playing in the present. In a world where you are stuck in the outcome, all your wishes in the world will not come true. But if you are not caught up in the outcome, your wish has already come true.
I believe that by becoming aware of your inner thoughts, you will be able to set goals.
Believe in yourself and celebrate your goals. Every moment you do so will create the best life for you.
Thank you for reading.